20.12.09

nervous.

First off, R.I.P. Brittany Murphy. Man, she was so young. What a shame...


I miss being young. Young as in middle school aged. Those were such simple times...like forreal. Back when you just knew you were the shit, and other people thought you weren't, but they never said anything because they were thinking the same thing about themselves. Haha! I miss that so much...

On another note:

I'm getting anxious. Impatient. &&Those who know me know that patience is something I don't posses. I want this to go further. Take it to the next level. Like get serious with this. No bull. But I don't know how he feels...&&I don't know how to exactly begin talking to him about it. What if he doesn't feel the same way? One of my biggest fears since I've broken up with my ex back in January is that I'll never be a good girlfriend...because that's how he made me feel. Pretty much like a failure. That's why I am like I am now. &&Why I acted so wild over the summer. It's not something I'm proud of...at all. Since the break up...I've been all over the place as far as the dudes I've been talking to. Then it got out of hand. But I got myself back under control. And now I'm ready to settle, finally! But is he?

&&Honestly at this moment, I want to see him more than anything. Look him in the eye. Make him smile that gorgeous smile. &&Then have him hold me. For a long, long time. &&That's it. Nothing more, nothing less.

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